Tami Gaines’ story is that of a hard-wrought journey of survival and thriving against all odds, and at great personal costs. But it is often when we are most challenged that our greatest strengths emerge.
Tami’s story is one of turning struggle to triumph, and converting pain and agony into opportunities for discovery, growth and renewal. She is an ideator,entrepreneur, single mom of four, author speaker, and radio show host, passionate about educating and empowering others to excellence.
From her desire to serve, while nurturing her own entrepreneurial dreams, Tami created The Rebirth of Soul programs, books and radio show, to help others find the one moment in their greatest challenge, when they discover that they are not as weak as they once believed – the moment when they find their inner strength. The one moment that makes everything that follows… possible.
Tami is committed to helping women in transition rebirth the soul of their most difficult experiences.
We hope you enjoy the conversation with Tami, and visit her site to learn more about her incredible journey from pain, tragedy and conflict to success and resolution.
Tami Gaines‘ life has been largely defined by tremendous achievement, though the road to those successes has often been lined with giant potholes – seemingly insurmountable obstacles. Tami’s has been able to find hidden gifts of growth in every challenge and embrace each setback as a choice to be bigger than her problems, and now she’s passionate about helping other do the same through her speaking, training, books and programs.
And, while Tami is three years younger than the youngest of the boomer generation, her story of personal transformation, adaptation and reinvention is inspiring, with lessons and learnings for anyone.
If you were told you’d never walk again, would you accept those words as truth? Fortunately for her family and clients, Kathie Nelson did not sit down, lay down and give up, when it seemed like her life was over.
Instead again all odds, she began leading with strength. First getting her own life back together, then climbing back to physical ability and business success.
Because of that… because Kathie has pushed through incredible personal challenges, to get to be where she is today, she’s able to helps her clients achieve their best.
Kathie is a compassionate, but results driven visionary, guiding business leaders to achieve and succeed.
In fitness, personal trainers push you to your own success because they’ve first achieved their own. In business, it’s the same with good business coaches.
Kathie discovered that about herself the hard way, but it’s a lesson she turned into a success story, in running her own business and life, and helping her clients do the same.
Through Kathie’s various life circumstances, which she shares in this interview, she decided at a very young age, to never be dependent on someone else again. That’s actually a pivotal life circumstance for many entrepreneurs, and especially women, because then it’s not just about job independence, but also relationally.
KathieNelson.com is just one of Kathie’s ventures. She and her mother, Bette Laughrun, a ‘Beyond Boomer’ entrepreneur and author, have co-written a book, just out, titled, I Want What She’s Got!
AND… there’s also a wine label in Kathie’s family future! Tune into this inspiring interview with Kathie Nelson.
Founder and CEO Kathie Nelson, is a serial entrepreneur and born powerhouse in business growth, is a four times author, highly sought after speaker, top tier business strategist, and coach.
We had numerous technical challenges during this interview, due to the intermittent internet that can happen in the boondocks of Wyoming, and a cowboy more comfortable on a stallion in the wild outback, than with technology.
But in true pioneer style, though it may not always be pretty, we made do with what we had and we made it work. Thanks to our awesome video team for splicing together the five different videos it took to capture this chapter of Reid’s inspiring story, it’s much better, but if you hear references to glitches, and see the odd phone icon on the screen, well you’ll have some context.
Reid joked about our technical challenges, saying:
“You know what the information super highway is in Wyoming, don’t ya? Two pick-ups pulled over on the side of the road, facing opposite directions, talking.”
Meanwhile, you’re sure to enjoy Reid’s story-within stories-of his journey to becoming a #1 best-selling, historical western romance novelist.
We especially love how it is that Reid began his successful author career during his second half of life, about 5 years ago, around the age of 56.
Reid is an astute businessman, an amazing, eloquent and brilliant story teller, and as good at wrangling words as he is cattle. It’s fun catching up with Reid from one of his ranches in Wyoming. He’s a man on fire… a man on a mission, and a boomer living full out.
We didn’t even have time to go into his other bestseller book, Land for Love and Money, or his eco-rancher principles and deep and spiritual connection with the land, so we’ll be visiting with him again in the coming year. Meanwhile, if you love novels, mystery, history and stories steeped in the lineage roots that all Americans share, you will love his novel series, Threads West: An American Saga.
A disclaimer: I don’t read fiction, so while I’ve only read but part of Reid’s first book, it was enough to know the quality and grand scope of his master storytelling ability. Meanwhile, my entire family—from teens, to hubbie, to mother, to an aunt and uncle—has read all three of his first novels and eagerly away the imminent release of his fourth book, Moccasin Tracks.
“Forged in the crucible of history, shaped on the anvil of a dangerous land, the threads of their lives and torrid loves interweave with the evolution of America and the West.”
I highly recommend the audio version, read by Reid himself, which you can find here:
Oh… by the way, I forgot to mention that the Threads West, an American Saga series is slated to be 33 books!!! WOW!!! That’s extraordinary. Like Reid. And it’s not just fanciful imaginings of a cowboy author. No, Reid already knows what will be in each one and has it all mapped out… perhaps symbolically reminscent of his second novel: Maps of Fate.
Folks, meet Reid Lance Rosenthal, an extraordinary man, a real cowboy, with the heart of an artist, and a captivating raconteur, weaving the threads west of our roots deep into the American west, and into the reader’s heart, as we meet those who preceded us, and forged the way.
Thread’s West, entertains, educates, enlightens, and intrigues, while revealing the raw fiber of the American soul, and how each individual strand brings it strength, color and character to the tapestry of a people and their land.
[Sorry about putting Mary Ann into such a small image box on the video. We had technical difficulties resulting in needing to utilize her mobile device instead of computer, which resulted in a much smaller screen for her].
Corporate globetrotter to Truffle Grower with a passion for coaching entrepreneurs, Mary Ann Hauser traded her cushy white collar career for slinging manure in mudruckers as a boutique farmer for exotic Truffles, along with her husband, Kurt Hauser.
When she’s not bagging worms for their vermiculture venture, pruning Filbert trees, and gardening, Mary Ann is coaching other entrepreneurs toward their own great success stories as an Action Coach!
Oh! And she’s also a wife, mother of two sons and grandmother of one.
Tune in to learn of Mary Ann’s journey into creating an extraordinary life, where in her second half, her creativity and entrepreneurial spirit are thriving!
We suspect Mary Ann is just getting warmed up!
Mary Ann is a business coach, consultant, and owner of a business coaching firm located in Winston-Salem. She is passionate about education and helping business owners make their businesses successful so that they can live the life they were meant to, and in doing so provide employment opportunity for others.
She and her family also own a farm in the Virginia Mountains that, she
Mary Ann’s background (prior to coaching) was in strategic marketing and business development in the pharmaceutical industry where was recognized as a leader in marketing and her leadership resulted in two Telly Awards for excellence in advertising; she was also awarded the “Founders Award” for Outstanding Leadership Dedication and Commitment to the pharmaceutical industry.
Today Mary Ann is on the Board of Governors at the Piedmont Club. She also serves on the board of several of businesses in the Piedmont Triad.
US Savings Bonds— There are 40 million forgotten matured savings bonds that have stopped earning interest. The estimated value is $16.5 billion dollars. That’s like having money stuffed in your mattress. It’s time to cash them in and reinvest the money.
Pension Benefit Guaranty Corporation— Unclaimed traditional retirement accounts worth a total of $280 million wait for the owner to claim them. There’s also a single listing for more than $700,000! Look for your deceased family members. If you’re an heir or the designated beneficiary, you may be able to claim it.
Housing and Urban Development (HUD) Click the link for information about possible FHA refunds.
IRS for tax refunds that were returned because of a bad address.
Federal Deposit Insurance Corporation (FDIC) — Find unclaimed funds for insured deposits that were issued and undeliverable or never cashed.
Financial Management Service— Each individual federal agency maintains its own records. If you think a government agency may have money for you, check out this site.
International unclaimed property sites including Canada, Australia and Switzerland.
If you check this time and there is no listing for you, remember to check back at least once a year because new listings are added all the time.
There is no charge to search using unclaimed.org or the federal sites. There are a lot of sound-alike sites. You should never ever pay for an online search. Some sites will let you search for free, but then try to charge you to file a claim. Don’t do it!
There is no charge to claim your money except for Texas that charges a 1.5 percent handling fee for claims above $100. States keep the interest that the money earns.
States hold the money indefinitely until the rightful owner or heir claims it, except for Indiana that only holds it for 25 years. After that, Indiana takes possession of it and you lose the right to it.
Nearly wheelchair bound for life before his 40th birthday, Chris Whalley took his life in his own hands and did what doctors couldn’t do for him: he healed.
Since his miraculous healing, Chris Whalley got his life back, but so much more than that, he became passionate about helping others get theirs back.
Few things are more defeating and immobilizing than chronic pain and deteriorating conditions. And few things more empowering than overcoming those, and even more, when it’s through the power of your own efforts, awareness and common sense.
That’s Chris’s story, and you can tune into the video interview by clicking on the video, and if you want more, you can also read Chris’s story below.
My Story, by Chris Whalley
How did I get to where I am, helping others to unlock the potential in their lives?
I was left to my own devices as a child. That doesn’t mean I was neglected, I was not. In fact, I had a very good childhood in comparison to so many. I was never shouted at or beaten, locked under the stairs or abused, and I am so grateful for that. Especially considering what many people experience today.
My parents both worked all the hours available to make sure we had at least comfort and stability. When my father fixed, built or created something, I was there with the questions. When my mother cooked for our family, repaired our buttons and stitched our clothes, I was there with the questions. I was looking, learning and taking it all in from a very early age.
I knew I was the odd one in our family because I was always very inquisitive and often annoying, wanting to have the answers for all problems. I would probably pass today as a nerd with A.D.H.D. This was reflected throughout my childhood, mainly at school where I was the skinny kid with national health glasses. I could usually be found hanging by my pass-me-down pants in the cloakroom. I was always pretty good at helping others feel more significant about themselves.
Today, looking back, it’s pretty funny but, even back then, I was always asking myself questions like Why do people bully me? How can I understand why they do it? I was the kid daydreaming in the back of the class looking out the window wondering, what’s it all about? I got to find out the answer to the first question in early secondary school when I met my need for significance by doing the same…Bullying.
I wanted to fit in with the other kids so I would do anything, like pick on the quiet kid or rub the blackboard clean after the teacher had spent hours the previous evening writing on every square inch in the most perfect handwriting. When asked, “Who done it?” my hand went straight in the air with a big proud grin. Why? Attention, a sense of feeling significant or unique, for that moment at least. Probably not the best way of bonding with the new teacher, but hey! I got the feelings I needed albeit somewhat unproductive and brief.
This continued for a short time until I picked on the wrong person who happened to be after my title of top bully. He won! That was it for the next few years at school. I became the target for a certain few teachers and 6th formers [students who stayed on in school to study for A-levels] whom I understand far more today than I did back then.
There were teachers who obviously were deprived of love and understanding as children. Punching and pinching, verbal abuse, threats and emotional blackmail were thrown at me. Even requests of oral sex from one particular teacher, which I was bright enough to understand as wrong. I was officially “Billy no-mates“.
Did I tell anybody? No! Did I want to? Yes! Why didn’t I?
I wanted to find the answers myself. Yep! I was weird, I wanted to be the hero. I wanted to be the kid that everybody looked up to. It was not uncommon for teachers to be backed up by parents so some kids may have been afraid of the punishment when they got home. That was not the case for me fortunately. I knew I wouldn’t get physically punished, maybe just a telling off or the threat of love being withheld, which is often the most detrimental yet seemingly harmless punishment. We must remember that humans need love, especially as children.
I was happy to lose my title of top bully really because I felt sorry inside for the kids we were bullying. I needed to find another way to get the recognition I was craving, the feeling of being unique and somebody. I questioned myself all the time for my thoughts and actions, even as a kid, but I never got to the bottom of some of my most basic compulsive behaviours until over thirty five years later. Behaviours you will learn through this book and realise are more common than you think.
Anyway, how was I going to meet my need of feeling special and significant? The answer came one day when dad’s friend lent us a video called Conan starring Arnold Schwarzenegger. What can I say! This was it; I had found the answer to all my problems.
I had never seen anybody like this. He was silent and powerful, he wasn’t being bullied and he didn’t need to bully others to feel like somebody. He had the answers to everything, with women lined up to be protected by his masculinity. I immediately decided, I want to be like this guy.
At last I had a sense of hope that my uncertain future of being “bullied Billy-no-birds” could be changed. Something in my belly was telling me I am in control of my physical person after all. We don’t just have to make do and settle as I had been led to believe by so many people, including my peers and even family. Wow! I don’t have to live with spaghetti arms or work in McDonalds after all!
This was it! I started collecting magazines and studying the professionals. I was hooked! The sheer fact that we could actually change the way we were physically was fascinating to me. My first real insight into the secret abilities we humans possess.
Being of the nerdy variety, I was inquisitive, practical and naturally gifted in the common sense department. I soon developed an understanding of the basic mechanics of the human anatomy.
All this energy and dedication at this time of my life was for one main purpose, to have that inner feeling of being someone. Why?
Besides I was never going to get a girlfriend looking like Shaggy’s little brother in Scooby Doo, with arms and legs so thin I could have been mistaken for a stick insect. I had so many spots (zits) I would be head hunted today by McDonald’s workforce department or mistaken for this month’s special at Pizza Hut.
I had reached that stage in life when many boys discover their sole purpose within our universe: the pursuit of girls-birds-chicks-babes. For many boys, this factor determines most of the decisions they make within the social systems. For example, if I were invited to any kind of function, my internal dialogue was calculating the probability of girls being there. This would usually decide if I were going to go or not.
School was becoming more difficult every day. I was rebelling against the teachers who thought it was funny showing each other how they could wrap their thumb and little finger around not just my wrist but my ankle too. I often wondered how this party trick made it to school from my home environment.
I never was particularly upset with the teachers about things like this, because I was used to it. I knew mum
and dad loved me very much so I just accepted it as a little bit of harmless fun. Well it did seem to make people laugh so that was ok, and it simply added some variety as a kind of party trick to new neighbours and friends, “Come and see our youngest son. He’s so skinny.”
I was the youngest of four brothers and the only biological to our father. There was a little competition between us at times but generally things was good. There was conflict between my eldest brother and father which I understand today as being an extremely common dynamic. It is also very common for these conflicts to go unsolved for many years, as sadly this is the case within my family today.
I remember being a content kid at home, entertaining myself with Meccano, batteries, pieces of wire, cogs, nuts and bolts and the like. I very rarely needed looking after. In fact, I quite liked my own company.
There was the odd cousin that sometimes looked after me who must have had some issues as a child also. She used to test her strength by squeezing my hands so hard I was convinced she wanted to crush my bones. Maybe she just wanted to see if the sound resembled a bag of her favourite crisps, which she was obviously fond of. The creepy part was the fact that she loved to smile with a deep closed mouth chuckle whilst she watched me cringe in pain.
Did I tell anybody? No. Did I want to? Not really. I had an insatiable appetite to understand things for myself, plus I didn’t want to be seen as a tell-tale. Much easier to avoid family disputes, as I had seen a fair few get out of hand.
My earliest memories of real positive influence was my grandmother Nan. She used to ask me questions like, “What have you been doing?” or “How did it make me feel?” She told me that everyone was good inside but some just didn’t realise it. She told me that one day I would be everything I wanted to be and achieve everything I wanted to achieve. She told me I would be special and make a difference in the world.
Throughout my life, I have questioned the orthodox ways around everything. If a toy was broken, I wanted to know why and can I fix it rather than throw it out. If I got sick, which was often, I silently questioned the doctor’s approach, which was medicine, antibiotics and pills. Why did I do that at such an early age?
Because, unbeknown to me at that time, Nan had planted some seeds in my mind. She turned up every Sunday for dinner with her “natural herbal remedies” and crazy ideas like using lemon, salt and honey to sort out most problems. They were ideas she was learning about from friends at the church she frequented. One thing I can remember is that much of what Nan suggested was politely ridiculed by most.
Thank you Nan!
Nan was a special lady: a loving soul that lived with pain and suffering of operations gone wrong. She suffered in silence so not to worry anyone else.
I’ve come to realise the most valuable skill we possess is our ability to ask ourselves the right quality of questions.
Not just asking others. The key is asking ourselves questions and the right quality of questions like how can I improve on this? As opposed to why can’t I ever make it work?
After school, I continued on my mission to be someone, striving to stand out. Working my first jobs, I collected rubbish and swept the streets. I worked as a baker, chef and construction worker. I repaired roads, dug holes and cut grass. I went on to own my own health club, then did stripping for crowds of ladies.
Continuously searching for that fulfillment and sense of purpose, I even joined agencies to become extras in movies. That was fun! In fact, all of the jobs helped to create who I am and what I have today.
During the early nineties, I was advised by doctors and specialists that I had some very common degenerative diseases to look forward to. In short, a future of disablement and misery.
As a child I have always been somewhat open minded, with a passion for knowing more, especially why and how stuff works. Part of my open mindedness was an overwhelming inner belief that there must be a simple answer to everything in life, beyond the world around us. Why are we here on this amazing globe of life? And, everyone’s number one question, what is our purpose?
My persistent curiosity led me to discover the answers that kept me guessing at the mysteries of our world. What are we here for? Is this all there is? Yes, there is a simple answer to how we are supposed to live; our health, wealth and happiness included.
I was told, like millions of others, that my deterioration is just what happens! It’s hereditary, it’s genetic, it’s just the way it is, so get used to it!
I was given numerous bottles of painkillers and antidepressants. Surgery was considered as a possible solution, fusing my spine together in several places. These drastic measures were thought necessary because of the years spent working in labour intensive jobs and as a semi-pro body builder.
In reality, I was told that keeping fit and healthy and working hard caused the degeneration of my spine and overall health. Some people, when told they are likely to get sicker as time goes by, turn to drink or drugs or both.
During the 10 years that followed, I gave up on my health and hobbies. I found myself on a slippery road to nowhere, soon to be unemployed, down and depressed.
In 2003, I hit rock bottom and decided to search for alternative pain relief away from prescription drugs. Although only temporary relief at the time, chiropractic treatments were very good. One day in late 2003, I collapsed for no apparent reason. It was soon discovered that I had contracted a mild form of meningitis. This was treated with an overdose of antibiotics. I was temporarily paralysed due to an unsuccessful lumbar punch [shot] to my mid spinal cord.
For many years to follow, I suffered various illnesses. One condition in particular was ulcerations within the lower bowels, which is often an early sign of bowel cancer. I was told that’s to be expected as my father has the same condition.
As time passed, I continued with chiropractic help and my overall health slowly improved. However, not to the point that I could continue with my hobby in fitness.
As time went on, I began to realise and understand that my overwhelming inner belief that there must be a simple answer to everything, was becoming true. The more I started to read and learn, the more I wanted to understand why people do what they do, which in turn explained my own thoughts, behaviours, and actions within my own past.
This soon led to studying psychology and human behavior. Then onto health and nutrition, which completely opened my eyes to a new understanding compared to what I had always believed as true. An understanding which contradicted most everything that I had thought as the correct way of eating, living, and thinking.
During the last few years, I came to the realization that all the doctors, specialists and therapists who attempted to help me with my problems, shared certain commonalities. Nobody ever attempted to treat the root cause of my problems. For example, no one asked about my diet or what was happening emotionally in my life.
One of the most important facts I have learned…
… is that so many doctors and experts are sincere within their role and purpose, however we can be sincerely wrong and not know it.
Everything I have experienced during my very exciting life “good or bad” is nothing less than learning! I have no anger or blame for the doctors, specialists or those who have indirectly helped to shape who I am today. To those, I am truly grateful.
Today at the age of 45—and a grandfather of 5—I have no illnesses or disease, back problems or bowel problems. I am able to adapt, use and deal with stress as we are all supposed to. In fact, I feel healthier, fitter and younger than at most other times in my life. All this is due to some radical yet simple changes to my living, eating and thinking.
My passion now is to teach others not to follow the orthodoxies we have come to believe are the only way for health, happiness and fulfillment.