Friendship, Vulnerability, and Daring to Be You

Brene Brown, Vulnerability, Courage, Friendship, Oprah, Super Soul Sunday, LeAura Alderson, Best Boomers and Beyond, Baby Boomers, Boomers Reinvented, Fair weathered friends,
Brené Brown, author of Daring Greatly, and The Gifts of Imperfection
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Love and friendship is the source of our greatest joy.  And our greatest pain.

Brené Brown’s messages touches my heart and speaks to my sense of life, of friendship and of daring greatly to live and be more than I’ve been before. To be more than I—and others—have assumed I could be.

I first discovered Brené on her first TED talk on The Power of Vulnerability.  It has received over 19 million views, so it clearly touched a resonant chord within many of us.

Clearly, she wasn’t doing a rehearsed talk on vulnerability but rather she was epitomizing her concept, even as she spoke it. Since then I’ve read her book Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead.

Brene Brown, Vulnerability, Courage, Friendship, Oprah, Super Soul Sunday, LeAura Alderson, Best Boomers and Beyond, Baby Boomers, Boomers Reinvented, Fair weathered friends,Excerpt from a TED Blog article by Kate Torgovnick May: “When we spend our lives waiting until we’re perfect or bulletproof before we walk into the arena, we ultimately sacrifice relationships and opportunities that may not be recoverable, we squander our precious time, and we turn our backs on our gifts, those unique contributions that only we can make,” says Brown. “Perfect and bulletproof are seductive, but they don’t exist in the human experience.”

 

Brené Brown, TED 2012
Brené Brown, TED 2012, Listening to Shame

Whether you’re struggling with anything now, or not, you will benefit immensely from Brené’s TED talk in 2012, titled Listening to Shame. She begins by sharing a conversation with a good friend of hers.

Which, by the way, was inspiring not only because of Brené’s vulnerability in sharing, but also because of her friend. We all need a friend like that. The kind of friend who will never hesitate to speak the truth from her perspective, no matter if it’s pleasing to the ear or not. And yet who loves us anyway… warts, bumps, bloopers and all.

We all need the kind of friend—and to be that kind of friend—who celebrates our victories, cries over our pains with us, and yet always… always speaks her mind, tempered through her heart.  Guys too.  Guys need that kind of friend, and need to be that kind of friend.

Deep and meaningful friendships that have withstood the test of time have this going for them.

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Friends can help us see and navigate obstacles. We’re on the journey together, each sometimes leading, following, nudging and helping.

Brene Brown, Vulnerability, Courage, Friendship, Oprah, Super Soul Sunday, LeAura Alderson, Best Boomers and Beyond, Baby Boomers, Boomers Reinvented, Fair weathered friends,The deep relationships that weather the storms of time, are those built on mutual learning, growth, respect and love…. on an assumption of trust and love.  And, someone with whom you can be vulnerable. It is only in our vulnerability that we are truly real.

If we are not truly real together, then who are we?

Brene Brown, Vulnerability, Courage, Friendship, Oprah, Super Soul Sunday, LeAura Alderson, Best Boomers and Beyond, Baby Boomers, Boomers Reinvented, Fair weathered friends,BUT… Brené also cautions us about vulnerability in her second book, The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You’re Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are. She says:

“We need to look before we take the vulnerability leap, and choose carefully who we open up to.”

Many people dive in with both feet and a bare heart and share their soul too soon.

In talking with Oprah on Super Soul Sunday, about her Gifts of Imperfection book, Brené Brown elaborates on this, speaking of six types of people as “friends”, some of whom may not be the place you go to be vulnerable.

It is only in true vulnerability that we are ultimately real. Brené Brown
Brene Brown, Vulnerability, Courage, Friendship, Oprah, Super Soul Sunday, LeAura Alderson, Best Boomers and Beyond, Baby Boomers, Boomers Reinvented, Fair weathered friends,
Fair-weathered friends… will they still be there when…? Through thick and thin?

Yet trust not only the fair-weathered friend. If we can trust enough to be vulnerable and safe, known and yet loved, understood, while understanding, and appreciated for who we are, that is a solid foundation.

For growth and progress best friends are cheerleaders and coaches, for from time to time, we all need a hand, a cheer, a mirror, and a boost.

We do not want the friend who will tell us what we want to hear, no matter what they really think, do we?  As soon as that happens, a layer of dishonesty enters the relationship and erosion begins.

 

Oprah asks what Brené is really looking for [in a friend], and Brené says:

“I’m looking for the person who loves me not despite my vulnerability and imperfection, but because of it. I’m looking for what I call my ‘move the body’ friends. I’m looking for the folks who are going to show up and wade through the deep with me… and I think it’s a myth that you should have more than one or two of those.”

Me too, Brené. Thanks for your courage in daring greatly to be vulnerable, and in so doing, to help pave the way for the rest of us.

How about you?

Visit with Brené´ on TED and on Oprah’s Super Soul Sunday, and for Part Two on her 6 types of people as friends.

Brene Brown, Vulnerability, Courage, Friendship, Oprah, Super Soul Sunday, LeAura Alderson, Best Boomers and Beyond, Baby Boomers, Boomers Reinvented, Fair weathered friends,
Rainy day friendships endure.

For another great article on friendship and authenticity, we enjoyed this poignant article by Steve Tobak posted on Entrepreneur.com.

Life Wide Open

EDITORS NOTE:  We had several technical systems challenges on this interview, between the translator and bandwidth issues, but overall, these are barely noticeable for the audience until the very end, so please tune to meet Karen and get inspired!

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Life Ahead of Me is Wide Open

1186245_10151521032846652_851244046_nLiving life wide open, Karen Putz is a woman on fire with passion and purpose.  She turns 50 this year, in 2015, and she’s looking forward to it with pride, as well she should, because she looks younger today than she did five years ago!

Deaf at age 19, Karen is a mom, wife, champion barefoot skier, many-times author, speaker, advocate for the deaf and overall amazing and wise human being.

“All our life experiences are building blocks to the next opportunity, to the next path, to the next journey, and it’s up to us to take that and go in that direction.”

Karen sees her life as wide open, with loads of projects and possibilities… she has her list of top 100 things which she created during a life-transforming experience with Debra Poneman, in her Yes To Success program, and we’ve no doubt she’ll be checking on that list and creating a new one!

“When you surround yourself with people who are doing these things, you get the sense that you can do it too.”

“Everyone said, ‘You’re going to hurt yourself. You can’t do this.  You’re too old to be thinking about this.'”

karen-pearl-barefooting1-300x200“I have role models in my life that I didn’t have before… that are living life, who are breaking the boundaries.”

“”I have learned that time is a really precious commodity to me now. I don’t spend time around toxic people.”

“I find I am much happier when I’m around people who are like-minded… who have dreams, who are deep in their own passions and don’t have time for the pettiness of life.”

 

For more of Karen’s story, be sure to visit the inspiring media site for boomers:  Growing Bolder, that we mention several times in the interview.  They have a great video of Karen’s story where you can get some more of the details beyond our video interview.

Karen Putz is passionate about helping others unwrap their passions at any age. And she’s a living example of someone who has overcome adversity and struggles. No longer flailing in the wake of the past, she is forging her future by living each day fully engaged… living life wide open.

 

Karen was born with normal hearing and became hard of hearing after a bout of illness in elementary school.

Karen Griffard Putz
Karen Griffard Putz

At the age of 19, she tripped over a wake while barefoot water skiing and cartwheeled into the water. She thought she merely had water in her ears, but being deaf was here to stay, thanks to a wacky gene in her family. Becoming deaf turned out to be a blessing; after she dried the tears, Karen decided to embrace life and a whole new world opened up.

Today, for starters, Karen is a speaker, writer, Passion Coach, and competitive barefoot water skier, and above all, a mom. Visit with us, and please connect with Karen, and check out her books.

You can connect with Karen via her website, or:
Twitter
Facebook
LinkedIn
Instagram
Pinterest
Email 

RESOURCES

BOOKS KAREN HAS AUTHORED OR CO-AUTHORED

Global Voices of Social Media: 25 Women Share Stories of Strength, Love and Triumph

Chicken Soup for the Soul: Find Your Happiness: 101 Inspirational Stories about Finding Your Purpose, Passion, and Joy (Chicken Soup for the Soul (Quality Paper))

In Pursuit of Passion: An Inspirational Journal

 

ORGANIZATIONS

Hands and Voices

 

PROGRAMS KAREN RECOMMENDS

Debra Poneman’s Yes To Success

The Art of Work: A Proven Path to Discovering What You Were Meant to Do, by Jeff Goins

Dating for Baby Boomers

Are you a single Baby Boomer? Are you new to dating?  Have you given up on relationships?  Or maybe you’re anguishing over feeling like you’re in a dead-end relationship with no way out?

Huffington Post, Dr. Joe Amoia, GPS for Love, single dating, baby boomer dating, marriage relationships, how to find love, how to revive a stale marriage, dating coach, love coach, ambassador for love, LeAura Alderson, Baby Boomer Generation, Best Boomers and Beyond
More than half — 56 percent — of single baby boomers surveyed said they were open to the idea of dating, while 45 percent said they already were dating. Huffington Post

Our friend, Dr. Joe Amoia over at GPS for Love, is an expert on dating and relationships.  It’s a topic he’s so passionate about that he left a lucrative chiropractic practice to follow his heart helping people with matters of the heart over the back!  But interestingly, Joe also knows that happy relationships go a long way toward contributing to overall health and wellness.

“Eventually you will come to understand that love heals everything, and love is all there is.” Gary Zukav

Dr. Joe shares his story on this interview on how he got involved in dating coaching, and you can also checkout the article he wrote for us on how his Midlfe Crisis Was Really a Midlife Calling.  Perhaps you can relate?  If you have your own story of a transformation that led to an entirely new career or life reinvention, please let us know!  We love your stories!

Dr. Joe Amoia, GPS for Love, single dating, baby boomer dating, marriage relationships, how to find love, how to revive a stale marriage, dating coach, love coach, ambassador for love, LeAura Alderson, Baby Boomer Generation, Best Boomers and Beyond
Telly Savalas, “Kojak”, 1/21/1922 – 1/22/1994.

Okay… flashback to the 1970’s. Do you remember Telly Savalas of Kojak fame?  Well Joe reminds me of Telly.  Joe says, “I’m a bald guy with a big nose”.  Well, like Kojak, Joe’s a charismatic, straight-talking New York – New Jersey guy with a big heart, who will tell it like it is, while helping you make it what you want it to be. Your romantic life, that is.

Joe’s regular emails and blog articles are entertaining, insightful and fun to read, while offering lots of poignant tips and advice for dating and relationships, no matter your age. In fact, Joe says that about 50% of his clients and readers, viewers and fans are of the baby boomer generation!

Dr. Joe Amoia, GPS for Love, single dating, baby boomer dating, marriage relationships, how to find love, how to revive a stale marriage, dating coach, love coach, ambassador for love, LeAura Alderson, Baby Boomer Generation, Best Boomers and Beyond
If you’re a single boomer, are you open to dating?

So, if you want to know three signs a guys is committed to growth, or whether your wasting your time on the wrong guy, or the tools for healing a broken heart, please tune into this interview and visit and peruse his relevant articles and videos.  Dr. Joe’s got answers that will help you, single or not!

Meanwhile, the statistics on single boomers is surprising: first, approximately 33% of baby boomers are single!  But, the good news: most of them are open to dating.  I predict Dr. Joe will be very busy soon.

We hope you enjoy this interview with Dr. Joe Amoia, of GPS for Love.  Let us know, will you?  You can post comments below, or on our Facebook page, or if you prefer to be more private, you can email us.

Dr. Joe Amoia, GPS for Love, single dating, baby boomer dating, marriage relationships, how to find love, how to revive a stale marriage, dating coach, love coach, ambassador for love, LeAura Alderson, Baby Boomer Generation, Best Boomers and Beyond
Dr. Joe Amoia, The Ambassador of Love, at GPS for Love.

 

Dr. Joe Amoia, teaches women all over the globe how to put themselves in position to win the Game of Love over at GPS for Love. Visit Dr. Joe’s site and learn from his unique approach through his many creations: ‘Checklist for Love Program’, ‘The ABC’s of Smarter Dating: 26 Tips and Strategies to Immediately Improve Your Love Life’ and the ‘Dating Power Unleashed’ audio program.